chapt er 7

I feel so hopeless, i came to believe that for me there is no God. mother continues to beat me but as i always i hold back my tears so i don't give her the satisfaction of my defeat. i feel so alone i let go of all of my dreams i do not even let my imagination work through out the day. i remember one morning my mother and brothers ate pancakes for breakfast as usual she didn't give me any. but she gave the leftovers to the dogs. after the dogs picked through what they wanted. i got on my hands and knees and finished eating the scraps of pancakes.i knew that was my only means of eating. the only thing mother wants from mother anymore is his money. i will always remember the day that father left forever, i felt so alone. i didn't want my hero to be gone. i wanted him home with me. i knew that what i wanted didn't matter when he told me that he was sorry and could not handle anything anymore. mother has full control over me now. now it is going to be worse than what it has ever been... why, why does this have to be me? i will never be free, and i will never understand why mother does this to me!